LOVE

Today I am thankful for the unconditional love of family!
The love that encourages us to step up and support when needed,
to help out in the little ways that make the biggest difference AND
in the big ways that mean sooooo incredibly much,
to just BE there in any way possible,
to pick up the pieces if necessary,
to say "everything is going to be okay"
to lend the ear
and the shoulder!
Sometimes it is the difficult or scary times that remind us how incredibly blessed we are to have such amazing support around us.
I love you dear family and I am so very grateful for each and everyone of you.

30.... Bring It On!!!!!

I really didn't know how I would feel about turning the big 3-0....
the more I reflect on it the more I feel excited about it!
I am 30 years old and gosh darn it, It feels good!!!!!!!
(so far) :)

I have learned so incredibly much through the past 30 years of life that I have been blessed with.

I want to say that I have grown more than ever over these past several years but I realize it has really been a whole different kind of growing!

I feel really good about the place I am finding within.
I feel happy about who I am and what I am learning about myself.
Life is not perfect but its perfectly imperfect.

I feel more at peace than I have in a long time.
I feel that I am FINALLY learning to "let things go" whatever those things might be.

I am letting go of being so resentful, of being so angry, of being so sad and hurt and frustrated. I am letting go of feeling betrayed and I am letting go of blame!!!!
I am letting go of being sooooo tired
tired of life
tired of responsibilities
tired of being a single mom
tired of feeling like a victim
tired of being in pain
tired of everything!!!!!

I am learning how to forgive......

and with that, I am learning acceptance!
Acceptance of circumstances beyond my control and beyond others control
acceptance of the many ups and downs of life
acceptance of the unknown

I am learning that life is really rotten and unfair and hurtful sometimes but that it is through these struggles that we grow the most and learn the most about ourselves.

I am learning that all of these things take time and that some days are going to be really good and some days are going to be really bad. I know that all of these feelings are going to try to creep back into my heart and that I will continue to work through this.

Most importantly, I have learned that all of this is okay
that I am okay!

I have one chance at life and my arms are wide open!!!!!!

So bring it on 30's
I am ready for the roller coaster.....
(I think) :)
what better day to celebrate CHANGE!!!!!!

AND
since this day really has never been all about me...
Happy Birthday my dear twin sis.
You are so many wonderful things,
devoted wife
dedicated momma
compassionate friend
beautiful woman
tender soul
I can never thank you enough for all that you bring to my life
Thank you for ALWAYS being there for me
for your loyalty and for your support
I love you so much!
Soooooo
Happy 30 you old hag :) :)
(that is for the comment on mom's blog)

Vacation At Last......

Brody saw the ocean for the very first time on our trip to Cali!!!!
He was so excited to see what it was all about and loved running away from the water as it crept up the beach.
It was so neat to watch him explore and take it all in....

He also got to experience Sea World!!!!

He saw all kinds of fun new creatures and even fed some fishies to the seals
AND met Shamu for the first time as well :)
Wow, was that an experience or what?

The cousins had soooo much fun waking up with each other each morning and enjoying that refreshing sea air. I think the highlight for Brody was the garbage man that drove right by our hotel one morning :)

We all had such an amazing time. For some reason being at the beach this time was just so much more refreshing than I have ever remembered. I really didn't want to leave it. There is just something so magical about walking along a board walk in the evening and listening to the waves crash against the water.... ahhhh!

Thank you family!!!!

PS.... Jessie got some GREAT pics if Brody at the beach
check out her photogblog

Catching Up

Brody received his very first award after completing a session of soccer tots....
he had a good time (dependent on his mood) but made such great progress from beginning to end with following directions and listening to "coach." It was so fun to be a part of this experience with little brodikens.
oh and yes his new hair do... (that sometimes gets done, and most the time does not :)

We drove to a pumpkin patch out on Ironwood and "who knows what", brody got to pick out his very own little pumkin. We got home to aunt B's house and this is Brody showing off the pumkin he picked out....

My little artist...... Brody's first attempt at finger painting....
Pretty good if I say so myself :) (thanks debbie)

Ohhhh and how could I resist posting this adorable picture of brodes..... he looks like a little turtle (like auntie Liz always called him since he was a babe :) )
Such a big little man he is becoming!
And such joy he fills me with!
My little boy showing momma his teeth. How precious does it get.... really????

I'LL BE TWO!!!!

My baby boy is two years old! Wow, how times fly....
It seems like just yesterday that I was lying on the couch with little brody asleep on my belly. Just watching his little face so angelic and innocent.

Now he is a walking talking little stinker who rarely settles down enough to fall asleep on his momma's tummy. It makes me so sad to think of how fast these two years have gone by, but it has been sooo much fun watching Brody grow. It seems that he has just sprouted into this wonderful little being who amazes me everyday with everything he has to share.....

From his tender little heart that has so much concern for everyone around him,
Just today he tells me, "don't worry momma." As we were taking a walk tonight he tells Auntie B to walk on the sidewalk because the cars will give her big owies. While I was at work he tells Nonnie "don't cry", and as I am pointing out the crickets on our walk he dramatically adds "don't touch momma." My little sweetie bug. Such a small little being to carry such great amounts of genuine and innocent concern. I think he takes after his auntie b... maybe his mantra will be "don't worry be happy" too!

And then there is his excitement about life....
The joy he gets from the sound of the garbage man and the ice cream truck! "I do, I do momma," he tells me when I ask him if he wants to go for a walk or to the park. I'm not sure I know too many people who get as excited as Brody does to see scorpions and grasshoppers, flies and ants, airplanes and helicopters, motorcycles and buses, and now (thanks to Asher) praying mantis and crickets :)

and his many special little ways...
the strangely happy smile he gets on his face when he is pretending to be a dinosaur, when he very rarely tells me "I love you so much momma," the way he grabs onto the corner of the pillow when he goes to sleep, his little dance moves and how excited he gets when "The wheels on the Bus" song comes on. How incredibly smart he is and how everyday he surprises me with the words he knows.

Broders you are such an incredible spirit. You have brought so much joy into my world and I learn from you each and every day. You entered this world with so much sensitivity and caution. Today you are a such a caring little guy with the confidence to push yourself to do something exciting but still that little bit of caution to make sure you are gonna be okay. I love you my dearest little boy. You are a true blessing.....

Happy Happy Day!!!!!

Happy Birthday little
Wyatt Bear
Nugget
Beef Toad...
You are such a happy ray of sunshine
I love to watch your little bowlegged run,
your big grin with those two front teeth
your beautiful bright blue eyes
and your loving little spirit.

We love you so very much
and are so very blessed to have such a
special little nephew/cousin.

Happy Number One Baby Boy!!!!

Some Faves...

My sis does an amazing job at photography!!!! She took some pics of Brody and I a little while ago and I got a little sneak peek on her photography blog. I have been anxiously awaiting the CD and when I got it this past weekend, I loved what I saw!
Besides some of the ones she already posted on her blog,
here are some of my most favorites....

Thanks for the fun morning Jess.
I am so very blessed to have you in my life
and so very grateful for these moments you have captured :)
Love you!

Camping

Brody was in his ELEMENT out in the woods this camping trip!
He loved waking up in his "house", chasing butterflies and grasshoppers, walks through nature, rides in papa's truck, and of course catching "cardads" (crawdads)!

Some of the highlights captured....

Playing in the rain in his "hopper" rainjacket.

learning to swing the bat at the ball

(look at that grip)

my beautiful little boy...

and of course he LOVED walking bubba

best of all, being with family!!!

Who you are speaks so loudly I can't hear what you're saying.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

WOW!!!!
This quote speaks volumes and I feel it deep within me....

I heard this the other day on a video we were reviewing to show at a training for our foster parents. It really reminded me that I can teach Brody so many things through my words but I need to be so much more cognitive about what I am teach him through my actions.
A little scary :)
So many times I have ideas about who I would like to be. I can talk all I want about that person, but at the end of the day I can only hope that my actions have represented THAT person...
Especially when this little guy is at stake :)

I am from...

My Mom did this a while back and I absolutely loved it. So now I am finally making the time to do it too. I would love to hear some of yours...

Here's the template if your up for it :)

It's harder than I thought it would be, but so much fun!

I am from...

I am from a cul-de-sac, from BMX bikes and riding down steep hills barefoot on skateboards.

I am from 1511 Sacaton Dr., dirt roads, dead ends, orange soda handed out by Joe.

I am from the honey suckle bush, roses, potato bugs, the green grass, dandelions and tumble weeds.

I am from playing board games and unconditional love, from Juanita Pearl and Turgesen and Grove.

I am from the warm sunshine spilling into the living room and beautiful relaxing music floating through the air.

From “finish what you started” and “be kind to others.”

I am from Wednesday night meeting and Sunday Morning Church. Potlucks on Sundays, getting treats on the long drives home, peaceful hymns, convention in tents, making whistles out of river grass.

I’m from Arizona and Norway, spaghetti and Sunday roast.

From the father of honesty and gentleness, who can make anything out of wood, enjoys sailing, golfing and reading, “life is good” from a mother of great unselfishness and a protective nature, who loves the beach, decorating and music, from four beautiful sisters who share childhood memories, laughter and tears and who support each other through everything.

I am from Holbrook and Farmington, family reunions in the woods and at the beach, college days in Flagstaff, road trips with best friends. From my parents playing the guitar and singing, being a twin and the three little ones, evening back rubs, “I’m a little tea pot”, bear traps, murder in the dark the old fashion way and British Bull dogs.

I haven't been able to take many pictures of Brodes lately because my camera is broken :(
I took these with Britt's camera the other day and thought I would share.
Brody is settling right in at Auntie B and Uncle Cory's house.
He wakes up asking for "baby" and "aunt b"
and loves to have Uncle Cory take him out back to play with the doggies.
I am truly blessed to have my sis and brother-in-law open their home to us and help us to feel so welcome.

Brody at his FINEST!!!!

Broders LOVES shoes....
He came out of Auntie B's bedroom wearing these shoes
and we couldn't resist capturing this image. (while we were laughing in hysterics)
He is holding up pictures of Mater and lightening Mcqueen
that Auntie had torn out of some "car" wrapping paper for Brody.
He is quite the little man. :)

Jeremy J. Fresques

I remember the dances in 5th grade and how much guts you had to come ask me to dance back when the room was divided with the boys on one side and the girls on the other :)
I think I was like three inches taller than you too. :)
I remember late night phone calls (which really weren't so late considering we were in 5th grade), playing hide and go seek, and the many swimming adventures at your house which left your pool full of hairspray!
I remember moving on to Jr. High and how our paths split a little but you were always such a special guy!
Playing games on New Years Eve one year and begging our parents to let you and Justin stay the night with us girls (never happened)
I remember traveling to Telluride together... you, me, Britt and Mom Sherry. I was reminded at what a cheater you are when playing cards or any game for that matter!!!!!!
Jess and I visited you at your apartment on base here in AZ
floating down the salt river in our tubes
going to see men in black II as a fam (yes that included you ;)
Chats and emails here and there as you went through your vigorous programs in different states and we all got married
you were always such a strong individual.
One to always put your heart and soul into everything you did.
A genuine and kind spirit
You are truly missed!

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together"....

-Marilyn Monroe

This quote has weighed on my heart since I read it this morning so I thought what better way to re-enter into blogosphere with a heart felt quote ;)

It feels good to be back....

Hopefully I will be able to keep it up now that I will be moving in with my o-so-sweet sis!!!

THANKFUL THURSDAY

Need I really say ANYTHING more???????

Our little Brody is becoming quite the big boy!!! Already seventeen months old and time is NOT slowing down. He truly is the joy of my world and my love for him just continues to grow. It's actually quite scary!!!!!

This little boy is talking soooo much. Some of his newest words are....

cow, bee, candy (not sure who taught him this one :), dice (for out"side"), eggies, pancakes, bath, rocks, water, Asher, stairs, booger, fishy, shark, push, brrrr, choo choo, chair, bus, kitty, and most recently... "breakfast bar" (nonnie taught him that one)!

He wakes up every morning asking for his true love... Jush (juice). Usually after a little while he will take me to the fridge (which he can open on his own) and ask for his second love... "cheese!" Quite the breakfast huh.

Then, it is usually a decision between watching "cars" or "mow" (mickey mouse). Lately mickey mouse has been winning which is actually a nice change. For someone who doesn't like to watch movie's more than once, I think I can quote the entire Cars movie :)

Some of his other loves....

toy cars, necklaces (or anything he can put around his neck for that matter), shoes, headbands, balls, choo choos, climbing on things, rice, his doggie and kitty cats, bus's (especially when we are driving), oh, and he now has some kind of infatuation with "poo poo." He really likes to help mommy with the pooper scooper and will point all the "poo poo" out to me. Unfortunately he will sometimes bring it to my attention by actually bringing it to me! :(

He definitely has a mind of his own these days and I am extremely grateful for all that he brings to my life.

I love you little broders, brody bear, brody buckets, brodikens, bonzi, etc

A Trip Down Memory Lane...

While Britt and I were at Mom's today, Mom was adamant about getting rid of ALL of the old prom dresses! Soooo we decided we would take a trip down memory lane and try a few on (especially the goofy ones...sorry Jamie :) )

any of these look familiar sisters???

Can you guess the year that these fabulous gowns were in style?

"material girl"Michael Jackson is missing his leggings! Sixteen Candles and...

teen witch called she wants her prom dress back (top that!)
I'm too sexy for my shoulder pads
Anyone for football????? "Ohhhh sexy girlfriend" Watch out ladies

in a few short years these will all be back in style!

How Times Have Changed...

10 years ago you we would have been roaming Gilbert in Ang's jeep or throwing a party at Mandy's house :)

Not these days....

Ang was in town from Colorado so all the girls got together to visit. It seemed chasing kids around, changing diapers, and cleaning up messes took first priority BUT it was good for the soul!!!

"the boy's playing ball" the innocent ones

two little monkeys jumping on the bed
Although she probably didn't notice her this time around, little Claire will be so thankful for miss Presley as she is outnumbered by all the"boys."
Thanks for the pics ween. It was sooooo good to see everyone!